'Why me, why does this always happen to me.'
Have you ever silently screamed this in your
head, I have regularly and the answer has always been simple…
because it's me, these things always happen to me because I am ME,
not someone else.
This isn't about what I do, whether it's sin or not, but about how
I do what I do. How i ask a girl out, how I solve problems, how I
do the numerous things I have to do each day whether, small and
insignificant or earth shatteringly important. What works for
someone else will not work for me, even if they look so cool when
they do it, because they are not me.
Discovering this first started when at my previous work place
everyone was encouraged to do an online personality test,
where I discovered I was according to this test an INTJ or
Introverted Intuitive Thinking Judging. Wikipedia on
INTJ's
Practically what this means is that I'm good with the big picture,
seeing the whole picture and analytically working through a
problem, but as Marina Margaret Heiss, University of Virginia put
it in the Wikipedia article,
Personal relationships, particularly romantic ones, can be the
INTJ's Achilles heel… This happens in part because many INTJs do
not readily grasp the social rituals… Perhaps the most fundamental
problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make
sense.
It's dam annoying that people don't make sense, but I finally
realised that instead of fighting who I am I have to accept it and
work with what God has given me. I am ME, not James Bond, Gandalf
or any body else, just who God has made me, nothing more and
nothing less.
It's not just what I do that shows who I am but how
I do what I do.